Everyone deals with heartache in their own way. Some try to ignore the pain and never heal, others just want to talk about what happened on a loop. For those who have felt deeply shattered by the loss of a loved one it may seem never-ending.
It’s particularly hard the more they realize that those around them can’t understand how it feels like unless they’ve actually experienced it. At that level. Otherwise, they will feel even lonelier and disconnected.
Here are 5 things only people who have gone through a very painful breakup can understand:
1. Small things will make you break down
From accidentally smelling their perfume to hearing your one special song, these things happen. And when they do, you are flooded with all sorts of intense emotions.
You are not sure how to deal with so much at once because the memories are so strong. Anything can be a trigger and there’s not way to avoid them.
2. The moments you spent with them seem even more special now
You knew your connection was truly something remarkable when you were together. And now that all of that is gone, what remains are the wonderful moments you had. You remember how they made you laugh or how they hated it when you started tickle them.
These powerful memories have gained a new meaning and you will hold them in your heart for years to come.
3. You are able to empathize better with others in grief
Who can better grasp the depth of what you’re going through then someone who knows exactly how it feels like? This is why you can understand and maybe even help people experiencing grief. A personal story that people resonate with will make them feel less lonely and will perhaps give meaning to theirs as well.
4. You feel the pain never really goes away
Once the initial shock of the breakup wears off, you are left with a immense hole. A void that no one and nothing can complete. There’s anger, resentment, confusion, depression – in other words, you are a ball of emotions.
In time, pain subsides, but it never truly goes away simply because we can’t erase our memories. What happened will always stay with us, the good times and the bad ones.
5. You find it hard to move on
Sometimes it feels like having closure and moving on are just fictions. Life does go on and you feel it with every change that has occurred in your life since they left. But forgetting is not likely to happen any time soon.
People heal at different speeds and with specific methods. For some it takes longer for certain reasons. Know that it is ok to allow yourself to let them go, it doesn’t mean you’ve loved them any less.
Hang in there, things will change!